I, Chooeypoo, hereby certify myself to be breathlessly unfit.
After 2 weeks of not touching my golf clubs, today's visit to the driving range was shocking. I was panting for breathe after 15 minutes, that felt like an hour, and couldn't believe how my stamina could deplete so rapidly. Only three conclusions really :
1) I'm incredibly unfit;
2) A lack of physical movements in the last 2 weeks;
3) My deteriorating nicotine control.
No denying it.
I am sure it is all of the above.
It was gross really. I stood at my little booth and went through a strange burping spree, that contained after taste of my morning Woolworth's Barbeque Crisps indulgence. Then I remembered why I always avoided eating before sports. It made me sick and without doubt, I regretted my gluttony. I gave up after half an hour. I reckoned I will be better off going back to the range tomorrow.
I'm starting to doubt about playing 3 games this weekend coming - 9 holes on Friday and Saturday, and 18 holes on Saturday. I suspect I'll need CPR by the end of Saturday and perhaps wheelchair too. I have no idea why my blister is taking longer than usual to heal. Another sign of ageing perhaps?
::: THE EMPLOYEE - THE COURT JESTER :::
The employee stares at her table calender and sighs. Two weeks have just passed and she knows that her life has reverted to devoting her time for everyone else but herself. She identifies the signs. She knows that if she doesn't take some action soon, she would, once again, be drowned in the shadows of everyone else's affairs but her own. Her organiser is a joke. Parallel to her nicely ticked off list of professional to-do list, lies her neglected growing list of personal to-dos. That's a problem the employee always had. Personal time management was not her forte. She always forgets this little thing called the "me, me and me" time.
Her life in the last two weeks consisted of two things, and two things only :
1) Work;
2) Playing tour operator.
The auntie and uncle and auntie's sister and mama decided that they are coming for a visit on the 1st of September. But as usual, the employee was most kindly given lack of notice and wayhey! It is up to the super-employee to conjour up a 19 days tour plan in 3 days, followed by a week of actually figuring out the route.
And this is when the employee is actually tempted to write on her favourite egoistic feminist topic -"Why Men Are Useless, One Dimensional" and "Why Men Can't Live Without Women" but alas! She decided to be obedient and curb the urge to curse and swear at the incompetency of men till pigs do fly.
Her BITCHDOMETER was hitting red light alert.
Warning! Warning!
System Overheat!
System shut down required.
Zip it.
ZiP iT.
ZIP IT!
She zipped her fingers and refused in what would have been her bitch galore for the month. She had to mentally remind herself over and over again that if she had nothing good to say, just shut up.
And she did.
She blended in with the furnishings for two weeks and played court jester to herself, juggling between organising the grand tour and work.
Work.
The mere mention of that word and she gurgitates.
Damn it. 31st of August is SUPPOSE to be her last day as a full-time employee with this company. But at this moment in time, the reality seems so far away. Good news is, there has been this sudden surge of business opportunities but bad news is, she is as good as being back in full-time employment. To add to her murderous frustration at the prospect of reverting to her job scope, the factory's incompetency is aggravating her thinning patience with this potentially bleak company.
She needs to find an escape route.
This is chaining the free spirit.
She needs to run.
"Get out! Get out!", the voice screams in her head.
But she just keeps running on her invisible treadmill.
Three months has passed since the employees last travelled. It feels like 3 weeks to the employee. And she is due for her next trip end of September. She had conveniently opted to travel late September this time to accomodate her relatives' visit. In the midst of playing court jester, she had conveniently procrastinated off planning her own overseas trip. She is dreading the hectic schedule. Mama and them are leaving on the 19th of September, which means she has to fly off almost immediately after they leave. Oh what joy.
On the brighter side though, she has conspired with Little Missy to squeeze in some "me" time. So they concurred.... they will fly to London together and finish their buys. Then, he can go Paris (the employee has been there twice and HATES Paris to the core) with his friend whilst she proceeds on to Hamburg for some "me" time. Followed by their individual agenda, they will meet up again at Cologne and continue their buy. They will end it with a leisure trip to Berlin.
And that... the employee is looking forward to.
::: GIVE ME THE GIFT OF CANON 350D :::
I don't know about anyone else but do you realise that conning mummy-dearest out of an expensive birthday gift is one of the toughest task in hand? Mothers are multi-gifted. Two of my favourites - they have a nose like smoke detector AND they are too damn shrewd.
So I attempted to coyly ask mama for a birthday gift - the Canon 350D.
Mama saw through me right away.
No.
Flat NO.
No debate require.
NO.
NOOOOO.
NOOOOOOOOOO.
Oh well.... At least I tried.
::: MY GAY EX-BOYFRIEND JUST GOT HANDSOM-MER :::
Fizzy was kind enough to post up these gorgeous pictures of my gay ex-boyfriend... JUST FOR ME. I'm touch-ched.
Swoon. Swoon.
He's gotten even more handsome.
Maybe I did make a big mistake ditching him for SA.....
Gorgeous Goliath
Goliath has matured. Hmm... growing old with me perhaps?
I still like it when he's all goofy (see sidebar "More Quirks").
::: GOLF & TENNIS :::
There must be some agreement between these two sports. Uncanny timing of major tournaments between both sports.
Tiger Woods just won the U.S. Open Championship. Final Score : -6.
Next up.... the last tennis Grand Slam of the year, U.S. Open starting 29th of August.
Looks like I'll be missing the finals. *sob*
I wonder why.....
*sob sigh sob*
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