I felt like I was going to die when I woke up this morning.
That excruciating pain!
My body is punishing me for over-abusing it yesterday.
It isn't my fault ya know.
I blame it on my golf instructor.
He told me, "Come on! Go for the ball! Pretend it is your boss's head and hit it real hard!"
And being the obedient student that I am, I gleefully heeded that instruction.
Well, mama did use to tell me, "Must always listen to teacher".
I was just being that good girl.
I listened to the teacher.
I hit the ball as hard as my feeble arms could take me, over and over again....
Just a mere 120 boss's head.
But teacher forgot to literate a very very important point.
I will feel like a wretched bitch the next morning.
Ouch ouch ouch.
Why do I torture myself so.
"Crap. I'm going to collapse and die. Do I REALLY have to work?", I thought to myself as I crawled out of bed. Then, like a hangover from too many tequilas from the night before, images of today's to-do list throbbed in my reluctant mind. One ugly jean flying over the head, two hideous jeans flying over the head..... three scissors attacking the jeans. Now where did that come from?
So Chooey puts the kettle on, kettle on, kettle on.
Chooey puts the kettle on as she needs her caffeine NOW!
Chooey stared blankly at the coffee dripper.
Blah blah blah.
Brain dead.
It's going to be a loooonnnnggg day.
***************
0830 hours
Intercom buzzed. The employee thought it was her faithful courier guy. "Hi. It's Annah.", she heard the voice over the intercom. It was her maid rather. The employee went back to her hopeless game of Spidey. She had a sneaky suspicion it was going to be rough day.
0900 hours
Called the bank. "Please hold on" blah blah blah. As usual, the employee was transferred to more than ten people before she was transferred to the right department. She continued playing Spidey as she heard the annoying repetition, "Please stay on the line. Your call is important to us. We will attend to you shortly." Amazing thing with the service in SA. It takes half an hour for a five minutes enquiry.
0930 hours
Time to play errand girl. Traffic was decent today. No major jam except on the M2.
1015 hours
Collections done. Needed to rush back to send urgent package out to the factory.
1025 hours
Assistant Buyer called. She wanted the employee to pick up two samples. U-turn. Boss called and drilled the employee about the two samples she was going to collect. Ear ache. Damn the M2. Jam again.
1045 hours
Jeans collected. Time running tight. The employee needed to get back in great haste to meet same day delivery service. As usual, she would call the courier company on her way back to avoid any unnecessary time-delay.
1115 hours
Back at last. The courier had dropped off the package from the factory whilst the employee was out running her errands. But she had to prepare that urgent package first. Later.
1130 hours
Done! Courier guy should be here any time now. And now... for the other package that arrived. Mobile phone. Lil' Missy. "Do you guys EVER read instructions?", the employee asked in a resigned tone of voice. Not much left to say. Her day was officially killed.
1230 hours
Where the heck is the courier guy? Mobile phone. Courier company. "Sorry. The guy said he was caught in a traffic jam. He will be there soon."
1330 hours
And the courier was still MIA. Mobile phone again. Courier company. Courier guy in toilet. Oh whatever! It was too late. The package was not going to make it to the factory before 1900 hours. Pissed off. Must punish body further. Must go driving range to vent anger.
1400 hours
Courier guy still have not arrived. Internet line suddenly dropped. X-file. Mobile phone. Call technical support team.
1430 hours
Courier guy - MIA. The employee gave up. The Internet line was sorted out. She left the package at the security post. She refused to wait for that idiot anymore. Just FYI, different courier guy.
1500 hours
Fuck! Terrible jam on N1. So much for going to the driving range. She turned off at Allandale, made a u-turn and headed back. Her day was a definite goner.
1545 hours
Back. The package was FINALLY picked up. She surrendered. Boycotted work. Prepared lunch. EAT. The end. Or so she though.
Intercom buzzed. The employee thought it was her faithful courier guy. "Hi. It's Annah.", she heard the voice over the intercom. It was her maid rather. The employee went back to her hopeless game of Spidey. She had a sneaky suspicion it was going to be rough day.
0900 hours
Called the bank. "Please hold on" blah blah blah. As usual, the employee was transferred to more than ten people before she was transferred to the right department. She continued playing Spidey as she heard the annoying repetition, "Please stay on the line. Your call is important to us. We will attend to you shortly." Amazing thing with the service in SA. It takes half an hour for a five minutes enquiry.
0930 hours
Time to play errand girl. Traffic was decent today. No major jam except on the M2.
1015 hours
Collections done. Needed to rush back to send urgent package out to the factory.
1025 hours
Assistant Buyer called. She wanted the employee to pick up two samples. U-turn. Boss called and drilled the employee about the two samples she was going to collect. Ear ache. Damn the M2. Jam again.
1045 hours
Jeans collected. Time running tight. The employee needed to get back in great haste to meet same day delivery service. As usual, she would call the courier company on her way back to avoid any unnecessary time-delay.
1115 hours
Back at last. The courier had dropped off the package from the factory whilst the employee was out running her errands. But she had to prepare that urgent package first. Later.
1130 hours
Done! Courier guy should be here any time now. And now... for the other package that arrived. Mobile phone. Lil' Missy. "Do you guys EVER read instructions?", the employee asked in a resigned tone of voice. Not much left to say. Her day was officially killed.
1230 hours
Where the heck is the courier guy? Mobile phone. Courier company. "Sorry. The guy said he was caught in a traffic jam. He will be there soon."
1330 hours
And the courier was still MIA. Mobile phone again. Courier company. Courier guy in toilet. Oh whatever! It was too late. The package was not going to make it to the factory before 1900 hours. Pissed off. Must punish body further. Must go driving range to vent anger.
1400 hours
Courier guy still have not arrived. Internet line suddenly dropped. X-file. Mobile phone. Call technical support team.
1430 hours
Courier guy - MIA. The employee gave up. The Internet line was sorted out. She left the package at the security post. She refused to wait for that idiot anymore. Just FYI, different courier guy.
1500 hours
Fuck! Terrible jam on N1. So much for going to the driving range. She turned off at Allandale, made a u-turn and headed back. Her day was a definite goner.
1545 hours
Back. The package was FINALLY picked up. She surrendered. Boycotted work. Prepared lunch. EAT. The end. Or so she though.
-- God knows how many boss calls during this time. More ear aches. --
1730 hours
Boss called. Lil Missy will only arrive in Joburg tomorrow with the remainder of my samples. Employee in all honest bitchiness, "Please make sure he is not late. Yes. Wake him up. Pour water on him if needed. But he CANNOT be late. I NEED my samples!"
Shudder.
The employee dare not think what sort of comical jeans she will be receiving tomorrow.
1745 hours
A colleague at the factory MSNed the employee. She asked if she could call the employee later this evening. She needed to talk. Apparently the boss had a talk with her. Ahhh... one of those boss talks. The employee knows it too well. Sympathy went out to the colleague. "Sure you can call! Talk to you later. Bye!"
1800 hours
And the employee's work day is over!
Thank bloody goodness!
****************************
One bad day with Spidey, another 4 days to go.
I'm losing it.
Big time.
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