Arrived back in Johannesburg on the 11th of Dec 2004. You couldn't imagine my excitement to get home. My home. My haven. My sanctuary. After three pathetic weeks of hotel-hopping and travelling between HK-SIN-HK-China-HK (yes, that was the exact route), all I wanted was my bed, my couch and my TV. Hibernation was (and still is) what I needed most.
But you think my quest home was smooth? Of course not! We are talking about THE Chooeypoo. THE Chooeypoo who always have silly problem. THE Chooeypoo who is a walking mishap. THE Chooeypoo who walks out of her house and problems come looking for her.
Blessed to be the yellow-skin girl who looks nothing like the locals in South Africa, I usually get through customs without any hassles. Murphy's Law. The one time that you lose your keys, customs officers pull u over. Not that I knew at that point I had lost my keys. I only realised it upon their request to check my luggage. I was flushed from my ass up. How could I have lost my keys? Not like my bunch of keys were by any chance small. It had all that ding dangs hanging off it. Oh well. Damage done. I told the custom officer that he could break my lock if he wanted to but I reckon due to laziness, he asked me to leave.
Thank goodness I had arranged for a supplier to pick me up at the airport. It was barely 0700 hrs when I left the airport and did not help that I could not enter my house either. Great way to start my first day back in SA. We proceeded to breakfast and managed to contact a locksmith to open my house door.
Then I realized the remote control for the main gate was lost as well. Bugger. Worst of all, my car key was also gone. And oooohhhh noooooo.... Mercedes Benz have to create cars that do not use normal keys for ignition. It has to be these funny remote control/electronic keys that cannot be re-fitted with the click of one's fingers. Double-Bugger. I was without doubt home-ridden.
Nevermind that... when I finally got into my house, I discovered that the electricity had tripped during my absence. Good grief! That stench in the refrigerator. Slap me silly but fermented milk is not my idea of a welcoming party. The freezer had defrosted, leaving a puddle of water in its compartment. This was the point when one had the perogative to be the sulkiest bitch alive.
The joy of being home overruled lost keys and fermented milk.
Nothing could get me down.
Mr Couch and Mr Samsung TV were saviours of the day.
Nothing could drag me 2 mm away from my couch.
Except toilet-calls and making coffee.
That evening, I got a strange house-call. It was the ex-tenant of this house. He gave me a key to the safe and wanted me to take his money out of the safe. Bizarre. I was rudely interrupted from my vegetating process on a Saturday evening to open a safe containing suspicious money? I think not. I refused his request and told him to contact the estate agent. I was not opening that safe without some form of supervision. Too suspicious. Collecting his money after six months of moving out? *raise left eyebrow*
My trip started out bizarre and ended bizarre - the start and end to this phase/chapter of travel events in my life. My haven was dust-filled from my three weeks absence. But no worries! Call the cleaners and viola! Spring cleaning done! Pest control was called in as well, thanks to my ever-friendly bug friends who come visiting - uninvited - every evening.
Summer. Garden. Bugs galore. Pest control didn't work. These bugs still come flying in every evening. Back to good 'ol Mortein again?
If not otherwise, the past week have been sedated. I refused to step out of the house unless necessary for work. I did say hibernation was priority in my agenda. Pizza delivery is god's gift to the hibernator.
This is only a transition.
I'll be on the plane again in a couple of days.
Back to Singapore for 3 days then to Thailand.
Not planes again.
*whine*
I want to be Samantha.
Wriggle my nose and I'm there.
I can't wriggle my snout but I can jiggle my fats.
Jiggly Fats doesn't work.
Did someone say Airbus?
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