WOTECT (Part 3) - CHOOEY'S MAKE-UP BAG

GOTCHA!

Did your eyebrow hit 10 feet high?
Chooey's Make-up Bag???
Yeah right!
You guys should know me better!
I'm still waiting for freebie lessons on "The Art of Face-Doodles" 'lest a make-up bag?
No freaking way!

Wait! Wait! I've got to deviate from here....

Make-up talk!

So.... a girl friend - another frequent traveller - and I were at Johannesburg Domestic Airport waiting for her flight. She is like THE woman. Always looking good, takes 45 minutes to get her face dolled up, and another 15 minutes to get dressed - excluding shower time. She is the sort that will not leave the house without make-up. She takes great care of her appearance. She must look pristine and dolled-up before she leaves the house. This never fails to amuse me.... something which I am completely hopeless and incapable of. So out of sheer boredom, I decided to do a little make-up talk with her.


Question : What's up with make-up and why can't you girls travel light?

"I'm better now. I've learnt to travel with only 4 pairs of shoes now."

• "4 pairs! Babe! I only travel with one pair and that's the one on my feet - my trainers! "
  

"But don't you have to match your shoes with your clothes?"

• "Yes. That's why I only wear jeans and track pants? They match the trainers."
  

"I'm already very good compared to most girls, you know..... I only carry small bottles of make-up and I keep to the minimum (like just MANY small bottles). You should see how some girls that I know travel. They have one product for every thing. Say make-up remover, they have 1 just for the eyes and another for the face. Then they have this bag of brushes for the make-up, and.....

• (She gave me a run down of all the possible make-up that girls uses. What the f***? I didn't even realise there were THAT many make-up products out there.... a product for every part of the face and for different purposes? )

• "Is it really that necessary to slap all goo on the face? How do you girls do it? Can't you live without it?"

"No. Just like I can't understand how can some girls go WITHOUT make-up. "

• (Ouch)

"I feel naked without make-up (this I've heard quite a few times from the 'girls-who-can't-live-without-makeup). It makes me feel more confident and I feel good."

• "Errr.... ok..... I guess I still not ready to waste all that time just for make-up. I was once told that it will probably be a phase but I would outgrow this once I'm 21... 22..."
  
  (I'm turning 28. Ouch again)

"I'm already considered very fast for girl. I only need 1/2 hour. Ai-yai-yai.... you should see some girls. They take at least 2 hours. And if you tell them to take their time, they will take 5 hours. If you rush them, they leave the house feeling crappy as they don't feel that they've made up a perfect face."

• "Do they ever get out of the house?"

Indeed, I'm not worthy.
I have major issues now.
Is this what being a girl is all about?
I've got a serious problem.
The last I checked, I have not developed an extra growth between my legs.

*******************

Make-up enthusiast I'm not.
But a techno freak?
That I am.
So whilst most girls possibly hand carry up to 10kg worth of make-up products (excluding the extras in the main luggage), I carry 7 kg worth of technology and electronics - excluding the extras in the main luagge.

And that's when I started to realise the irony of technology.....
Before we have these high-tech "portable" gadgets, we used to bitch about carrying that bulky Minolta or Canon and AA-battery operated cumbersome walk-man (later progressed to disc-man). But really, that was all there was to the traveller's bag. It was bulky, yes. But certainly not that heavy.

Here comes Mr Technology at its best. Everything is compact-size - digital cameras, digital video cameras, laptops, electronic toothbrushes, MP3 players etc..

"Oh... look at how small this thing is... how great for travelling!"

Then we OVER-stretch our budget and become tech-hoarders.
Then we realise that every compact-sized tech product is bundled with a not-so-compact-weight-CHARGER.
Then you spend time packing these chargers and cables, paying great attention so as not to muddle them up.
Then you realise.... WE LIVE IN A WORLD OF WIRES!
El-Ridiculous.

LAPTOP
Pronunciation: 'lap-"täp
Function: adjective: of a size and design that makes operation and use on one's lap convenient

Generic idea of a laptop/notebook (the electronic version; not those spiral-bound books that we scratch notes in) is SUPPOSE to be a PORTABLE, COMPACT-SIZED computer-device that allows feasibility in movements, thus convenience.

But as the tech-freaks know, these laptops have its limitations as well. With desktops, you can always add a RAM-card as you wish, get an internal disc player/writer at a close-to-nothing price, add every other damn knick-knacks at a darn cheap prices, and everything is "internal".

With laptops, every other additional components become external. And these 'external' extras cost almost twice the price of the 'internals', and end up being cumbersome objects that occupies most of your table-space.

I amaze myself with the amount of extras I have extended out of this one laptop that I possess. I look at my table and wires in awe as I'm doing my housewifely duties.

I admit.
I'm a slave to technology.
Techno-Hoarder?
That I am.
But the amount of external components I have?
El-Ridiculous again.

I will die one day buried amongst my technology.
For now, I kill myself traveling with bundles of wires, charges and adaptors.
Can someone PLEASE remind me what PORTABLE means?
God save our poor confused technological-bound souls.

External Components Overkill.... This excludes thy printer and scanner!

(From Left to Right)

1. x4 USB Replicator; 1 Slot always kept free for "All Other Removeable Devices".
2. Me El-Cheapo Webcam
3. External Numerica Keypad - Has anyone tried working on figures using those 1-9 keys on the laptop keyboard? No sweetie. Horizontal number layouts do not work.
4. Mandatory - The Moderately Mini-Mouse (not being corny)
5. 'SMC' Wireless LAN Router - Great stuff! I can use the internet whilst constipated in the toilet.
6. 'Lacie' 250GB External HD Drive - OK... this is the hoarder speaking.
7. 'TDK' 16x DVD-Writer - Bought this before the demise of my other Gigolo. Here's the catch : Why did I buy this when 16x writable DVD discs are still scarce in the market? Doh!

A Peek at the World of Wires I Live In!


Kenneth Cole Shoes???
Ha!
Just a whole lot of wires, plugs & extras.....

~ Chooey's 'MAKE-UP' Travel Tote ~

(From Left to Right) :

1. We start with the essential foundation - THE LAPTOP;
2. Then we move on to the other essential compact powder - THE MOUSE.
3. Abit of Blusher perhaps? - DIGITAL VIDEO CAM
4. And the eyeshadow..... - DIGITAL CAMERA
5. How can we forget the all-important lipstick - INTERNATIONAL CONVERTOR
6. Added choice of lipstick - 3-PIN MULTI-PLUG
7. To ensure gloss and effectiveness of the lipstick - CAMERA CHARGERS
8. The alternative maybe makeup kit - EXTERNAL HARD DISK DRIVE. There are music and movies in there ya know.... Have you tried getting stuck in a foreign country where everything on TV is dubbed in some alien language? Comes in extremely handy.

One must not forget the other must-haves - toners, moisturisers, cleansers and make-up removers. That will be all the plug-cables and USB leads... oh! Just one little thing I didn't include... My Toothbrush Charger.

What a dysfunctional technological age we live in.
What happened to light travelling?
Perhaps I'm not in comment about girls and their make-up kits.
Who am I to say?
Afterall, I carry wires and electronics the way they wear the goo on their faces!