... that to love is to be vulnerable.

Love is the opening of the heart, the welcoming of your beloved. Loving is not secure, authentic loving is risky. Security lies behind the walls of a closed heart. You either invite the union by opening in love, or you secure the isolation by closing down.

I always said God has a sense of humour! If my sofa could sink any lower, I'm sure I would have sunk 10 feet under from the vibrations of laughing! I swear I love these daily 'God wants you to know' messages. It has become daily food for the soul and on occasions like these, it never fails to make me laugh. Just when I thought getting back my mobile phone has closed my 2009 chapter... Thank you God for reminding me otherwise! *can't stop laughing*

Just during lunch today, I was asked the question about relationships and if I was looking for someone etc. I just shrugged it off and in my nonchalant fashion of replying "as it comes". I went on to explain that I'm good on my own so with or without someone in my life, I'm happy. And I guess after the last one, I have to admit that the reluctancy has gone back to where I began AND yes, perhaps I am in the space of 'you secure the isolation by closing down'. That's what I'm best at and being my alter ego gives me the perfect space to dwell in seclusion. And with all honest truth, I love it! Loving it a tad bit too much to be considered healthy.

To be vulnerable....ahhhh yes. That was where it all began. It's all coming back to me now. Suddenly i hear Celine Dion screeching in my ears.

vul·ner·a·ble (vlnr--bl)

adj.

1.

a. Susceptible to physical or emotional injury.

b. Susceptible to attack: "We are vulnerable both by water and land, without either fleet or army" (Alexander Hamilton).

c. Open to censure or criticism; assailable.

2.

a. Liable to succumb, as to persuasion or temptation.

b. Games In a position to receive greater penalties or bonuses in a hand of bridge. In a rubber, used of the pair of players who score 100 points toward game.

I'd love to hate this word. It was a BIG word. Taboo. One that I could not relate to... AT ALL. And then I paid a price to learn it. A price as big as that word was to me. So thank you for the reminder but yeah... can i safely say now my 2009 chapter has closed or am I gonna get another surprise tomorrow?

NO ONE can beat His sense of humour.